Do you hear that? The hideous, piercing dirge of a B-flat drone that is the unfortunate backdrop to every single World Cup match? It’s the vuvuzela, a stupid plastic trumpet that has infested the temple of the beautiful game with an incessant buzzing that is a cross between a traffic jam in Naples and a giant, booming mosquito. We’re going to tell you how to kill it.
If you have never heard a vuvuzela in person, you won’t know quite how loud it is. I hear one every time Barcelona plays a game and my neighbor expresses his over-excitement by forcing his asthmatic breath through the thunderous plastic horn. It is deafening. It literally makes my ears hurt, and it is the most annoying thing I have ever heard. Now imagine a football stadium filled with these things and you have an idea of the fun going down in South Africa right now.
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